Imagine if you could follow your ambition without drowning in it – how much more fulfilling life would be? That’s what Pause Purpose Play is all about – finding balance over burnout by setting you free from needing to be perfect, so that you can take action and get started with what matters to you, instead of getting stuck in procrastination and holding yourself back with self-limiting beliefs your inner critic tells you. In this podcast, Michaela Thomas, Clinical Psychologist, Couples Therapist and founder of The Thomas Connection, shares bite-sized learning around psychology of performance, habits, self-confidence, stress, anxiety, perfectionism, parenthood and couples relationships. The podcast will mix solo episodes with guest interviews; diving deep into their professional zone of genius and learning about how they have found pause, purpose and play in their life and in their work. My new book, The Lasting Connection, is available now from all good bookshops.
Episodes
Thursday Aug 26, 2021
Thursday Aug 26, 2021
Are you or your partner going through challenges to do with your physical or mental health? Odds are that this will also put a strain on your relationship, perhaps altering the balance of giving and receiving care. If either of you is experiencing physical or mental health issues, your relationship is more likely to be distressed.
This brief solo episode of Pause Purpose Play is based on chapter 21 of my new book, The Lasting Connection, about developing love and compassion for yourself and your partner.
In this episode, I cover the third of three threats to relationship connection; health issues.
Order my book, The Lasting Connection, here
Find me at www.thethomasconnection.co.uk
Instagram: @the_thomas_connection
Facebook: www.facebook.com/thethomasconnection
Pause Purpose Play Facebook group: www.facebook.com/groups/pausepurposeplay
This episode was edited by Emily Crosby Media
Thursday Aug 19, 2021
Thursday Aug 19, 2021
Have you lost someone you loved? Someone dear to you passed away, and you are dealing with the loss and grief afterwards? Or you are grieving things which never got to be, due to the pandemic? The loss you experienced can even be linked to something traumatic.
In this episode I speak to Dr Marianne Trent about grief, loss and trauma, and how to cope with it in a way which gives you the permission to move forward with your life again, towards joy.
Dr Marianne Trent is a Clinical Psychologist and author of The Grief Collective: Stories of Life, Loss & Learning to Heal. She weaves a compassionate approach through all of her specialist trauma, grief and eating disorders work with clients
We cover:
- What is grief?
- Grieving things that never got to be
- Traumatic loss
- Yearning for the absent
- Loss of self-referencing
- Grief and trauma combined
- Permission to feel joy again
- Not wanting to move forward
- Difference between grief and depression
- Bereavement counselling/grief therapy
- Processing transitions
- EMDR therapy
- Talking about our grief and not being okay
- Grief/loss in the pandemic
- Compassionate leave and kindness to self
- Crying as help seeking
www.goodthinkingpsychology.co.uk
Instagram @goodthinkingpsychological
The Grief Collective on Instagram
Order my book, The Lasting Connection, here
Download the free 4 min audio meditation, Self-Compassionate Break, here
Find me at www.thethomasconnection.co.uk
Instagram: @the_thomas_connection
Facebook: www.facebook.com/thethomasconnection
Pause Purpose Play Facebook group: www.facebook.com/groups/pausepurposeplay
This episode was edited by Emily Crosby Media
Thursday Aug 12, 2021
Thursday Aug 12, 2021
Have you and your partner argued more since you became parents? Is it hard to juggle it all, making you feel resentful about who does what in your home? Perhaps you are less satisfied with your relationship now that you are also managing the needs of a baby or several children?
This brief solo episode of Pause Purpose Play is based on chapter 21 of my new book, The Lasting Connection, about developing love and compassion for yourself and your partner.
In this episode, I cover the second of three threats to relationship connection; parenting.
Subscribe now to not miss the final episode, on how health problems can cause stormy seas in your relationship.
Order my book, The Lasting Connection, here
Find me at www.thethomasconnection.co.uk
Instagram: @the_thomas_connection
Facebook: www.facebook.com/thethomasconnection
Pause Purpose Play Facebook group: www.facebook.com/groups/pausepurposeplay
This episode was edited by Emily Crosby Media
Thursday Aug 05, 2021
Thursday Aug 05, 2021
Do you feel anxious when you do new things, not feeling confident? Are you hard on yourself, thinking that you're not good enough if it isn't perfect? Perhaps old beliefs hold you back in life.
Then this episode of the Pause Purpose Play podcast is for you.
Chloe Brotheridge is hypnotherapist, mentor and coach at www.calmer-you.com and the host of The Calmer You Podcast. She’s the author of The Anxiety Solution and The Confidence Solution.
We cover:
- Meditation calms your brain and anxiety
- Anxiety tool kit
- Rebooting old beliefs
- Imposter syndrome not a sign of ‘not good enough’
- Beating us up means we stop trying
- Three phases of moving from anxiety to confidence:
- Limiting beliefs, - Clarity on what you want, - Taking action
- Being brave and being scared goes hand in hand
- Courage comes before confidence
- Socialisation of women to have low confidence
- Over-protection of girls = need to be perfect and put others first
- The different ways perfectionism shows up
- Embracing the mess
- Permission to be a beginner at things
Chloe’s books:
The Anxiety Solution
The Confidence Solution
Download your free 4 min audio to give yourself a Self-compassionate break, here
Find me at www.thethomasconnection.co.uk
Instagram: @the_thomas_connection
Facebook: www.facebook.com/thethomasconnection
Pause Purpose Play Facebook group: www.facebook.com/groups/pausepurposeplay
This episode was edited by Emily Crosby Media
Thursday Jul 29, 2021
Thursday Jul 29, 2021
Have you been on the receiving end of an infidelity, having been cheated on by a current or previous partner? Perhaps you yourself have been unfaithful to someone you loved?
Then you know how the trust gets shattered and how it leaves you feeling a full range of emotions, from sadness, anger and anxiety, to guilt and shame.
If you haven’t experienced infidelity, tune into this episode to understand the risk factors for this happening in your own relationship.
This brief solo episode of Pause Purpose Play is based on chapter 21 of my new book, The Lasting Connection, about developing love and compassion for yourself and your partner.
In this episode, I cover the first of three threats to relationship connection; infidelity.
Subscribe now to not miss the following two episodes, on how parenting and health problems can cause stormy seas in your relationship.
Order my book, The Lasting Connection, here
Find me at www.thethomasconnection.co.uk
Instagram: @the_thomas_connection
Facebook: www.facebook.com/thethomasconnection
Pause Purpose Play Facebook group: www.facebook.com/groups/pausepurposeplay
This episode was edited by Emily Crosby Media
Thursday Jul 22, 2021
Thursday Jul 22, 2021
Why do we feel so bad at times? Why can’t we just be happy all the time?
Because we haven’t been taught how to understand ourselves, and what it means to be human, and instead chase constant happiness and think we have failed when things aren’t ‘perfect’.
In this podcast episode, Dr Soph, Clinical Psychologist and Author of ‘A Manual for Being Human’, talks about how we can understand ourselves and show compassionate curiosity for the full register of emotions we experience across our lifespan.
- Struggling against our emotions
- Feeling safe and secure in childhood
- Identity forming in adolescence
- Internalising bullying to an inner critical voice
- Pressure from the media to be perfect
- Unhelpful coping strategies making emotions worse
- Taking control vs. accepting and surrendering
- Micro aggressions and prejudice
- Shame vs. guilt
- Self-correction vs. self-criticism
- Tips for coping with emotions
- The 5-4-3-2-1 grounding technique
A Manual for Being Human by Dr. Sophie Mort
Order my book, The Lasting Connection, here
To download the free 5 min audio of the guided meditation Self-Compassionate Break, go to www.thethomasconnection.co.uk/break
Find me at www.thethomasconnection.co.uk
Instagram: @the_thomas_connection
Facebook: www.facebook.com/thethomasconnection
Pause Purpose Play Facebook group: www.facebook.com/groups/pausepurposeplay
This episode was edited by Emily Crosby Media
Thursday Jul 15, 2021
Thursday Jul 15, 2021
Do you struggle to be in the present moment with your partner when it comes to sexual intimacy? Do you find it difficult to talk about your desires, fears or needs when it comes to sex?
In this episode, I explore the physical intimacy, not just through sex, and explain why quality not quantity is key to a lasting connection.
This episode of Pause Purpose Play is based on chapter 20 of my new book, The Lasting Connection, about developing love and compassion for yourself and your partner.
Order my book, The Lasting Connection, here
Find me at www.thethomasconnection.co.uk
Instagram: @the_thomas_connection
Facebook: www.facebook.com/thethomasconnection
Pause Purpose Play Facebook group: www.facebook.com/groups/pausepurposeplay
This episode was edited by Emily Crosby Media
Thursday Jul 08, 2021
Thursday Jul 08, 2021
Does your brain run a million miles an hour, and it's hard to stop?
Do you have cycles of either procrastinating or being hyperfocused on a task, to the point of burnout?
In this episode, I talk to Michelle Minnikin about her experience of the ups and downs of living with ADHD.
Michelle Minnikin is a Chartered Psychologist and Coach. She’s the Captain of Work Pirates and Co-Founder of Inspiration North. She was diagnosed as having ADHD just before her 42nd birthday and suddenly her world made sense!
We talk about
06:00 Thriving off rules, structure and routine
12:05 Struggling with organisation
12:58 Fulfilling potential and recognizing strengths
15:18 Hiding coping strategies
17:59 “Good girl” conditioning
19:10 Using up energy to “fit in”
21:37 Rejection sensitivity dysphoria = the pain of criticism
22:30 Neurodiversity
23:26 The diagnosis stopped feelings of ‘being rubbish’
26:00 Anger over being mistreated
28:53 The strengths of ADHD
31:29 ADHD in men and women
33:40 Calming the brain with medication
35:50 Coming to terms with your true self
43:48 Playing Big
Order my book, The Lasting Connection, here
Find me at www.thethomasconnection.co.uk
Instagram: @the_thomas_connection
Facebook: www.facebook.com/thethomasconnection
Pause Purpose Play Facebook group: www.facebook.com/groups/pausepurposeplay
This episode was edited by Emily Crosby Media
Thursday Jul 01, 2021
Thursday Jul 01, 2021
If we want to both survive and thrive in our relationships, we need to allow the time and space to heal from hard times, as well as take the time to turn up the fun and build intimacy together in the good times.
In this episode, I explain the balancing act between enjoying your time together through shared activities and repairing your relationship when things have been tough.
This episode of Pause Purpose Play is based on chapter nineteen of my new book, The Lasting Connection, about developing love and compassion for yourself and your partner.
Order my book, The Lasting Connection, here
Find me at www.thethomasconnection.co.uk
Instagram: @the_thomas_connection
Facebook: www.facebook.com/thethomasconnection
Pause Purpose Play Facebook group: www.facebook.com/groups/pausepurposeplay
This episode was edited by Emily Crosby Media
Thursday Jun 24, 2021
Thursday Jun 24, 2021
Catherine Hallissey is a chartered psychologist, parenting coach and mother-of-five young kids. She's the founder of Reclaim Parenthood, an online parenting membership. She helps parents use the power of relationship and connection to address parenting challenges, create more peace and harmony at home and help children become more confident and resilient.
8:00 Restraint collapse and comparing home and school behaviour
9:45 Overcoming triggering behaviour
11:54 Vulnerability over shortcomings
14:38 Past experiences affecting your parenting style
15:54 Embracing imperfection in ourselves
18:54 Healthy repair of ruptures
22:40 Rejection and forgiveness
25:08 Self-compassion and parenting
27:42 Self care for ourselves
29:00 Amplifying good moments with our kids
30:58 Revenge bedtime procrastination
32:56 Finding the balance between having time for yourself and getting enough sleep
Find out more about Catherine at www.catherinehallissey.com
Order my book, The Lasting Connection, here
Find me at www.thethomasconnection.co.uk
Instagram: @the_thomas_connection
Facebook: www.facebook.com/thethomasconnection
Pause Purpose Play Facebook group: www.facebook.com/groups/pausepurposeplay
This episode was edited by Emily Crosby Media